autumn sunshine

Even the grimmest mission of necessity is made more pleasant by the warm glow of rare autumn warmth. Also, there were cock shadows. Always funny.

death to pubs

A number of factors have been cited to account for the rapid dwindling of the number of pubs here in England. The ban on smoking in enclosed public places is often mentioned, as is the aggressive pricing of alcoholic drinks by the major supermarket chains. Apparently, inner-city pubs are the ones closing at the fastest rate. Here is an example of one estate pub that bit the dust a while ago. It looks forlorn:

The housing estate, into one of the blocks of which this pub was built, appears to be inhabited predominantly by recent immigrants. A parade of shops and offices on the estate now includes a mosque, presumably indicating that a good number of the residents are of the Muslim faith. Being teetotal, such folk are not really in the market for a pub. this is my england wonders what possible use might be found for the abandoned, stubby little pub.

white screen of death

New visitors to this is my england may wonder what the hell the above picture is meant to represent. It doesn't look like much, does it? Just a bit of a wall somewhere.

Regulars, though, may recognise this as the Camden canvas on which street artist stu bags has fun with his stickers, stencils and other stuff.

stu's stuff was first noticed by this is my england in April, first photographed during the farcical AV referendum in May, and first discussed here in July. By August, stu knew his output was being monitored by this is my england and had made contact to make himself known. Later that month, stu was moved to make  use his regular chunk of north London wall to make a comment about the disturbances and looting that were gripping parts of our capital at the time. stu's efforts to do so, however, were thwarted by the intervention of an unknown hand. stu had pasted up six pictures of the violent disorder, each bearing his WE HAVE A PROBLEM slogan. In the twenty minutes he was away from the scene, the pictures were removed. stu had not managed to capture the work with a camera.

Whether the mystery hand was owned by someone who objected to stu's work, or whether its owner just fancied the photos for his or her wall at home, is a matter of pure conjecture. Picture thief? Or anti-graffiti vigilante? We shall never know. Unless someone writes in to this is my england to spill the beans.

Lightning, contends a well-known adage, never strikes in the same place twice. stu, this is my england is afraid to report, may now argue otherwise. This week, he informs this is my england that he went out on Thursday night to overhaul the white rectangle. Having recently suffered laptop problems, he decided to recreate the BLUE SCREEN OF DEATH by spraying the whole space blue, sticking a rubber keyboard under it and adding to the newly created piece with a stencil that had taken him days to make. The whole exercise having taken a while, stu was fearful of getting caught. While this is my england considers stu's work to be a welcome embellishment to the dull surfaces of Camden's now-closed Housing Office, this is not the universal view, perhaps, and it is to be supposed that apprehending street artists is among the duties of our constabulary. In his keenness to split the scene, stu neglected to photograph his work for posterity - a great shame, it turned out the next morning. Everything had gone. stu would surely have been forgiven the air the same shade as that deathly screen of doom.

It is to be hoped, then, that the next time stu goes to such trouble, he remembers to take a few snaps there and then.

For now, all that remains of stu's work in his favoured spot are a few ghostly impressions of the slogans of old. Let's see what happens next. Watch that space - this is my england will.

HARDER, FASTER, DISMALLER

It has to be said, that when this is my england considers the Tories' annual conference, the thought of hot sex acts enjoyed by attractive people does not readily spring to mind.

Props, then, to the Young Britons' Foundation, a group whose role is to bore on about the fabled 'left-wing bias' of the UK's media and education system. These fun-lovin' fogeys will be jazzing up the conference by launching a poster campaign that mixes sauciness with a weak attempt at humour, all in the name of slowing growth further with even more spending cuts.

Some have suggested that this is the closest the average YBF member can expect to come to sexual intercourse. 

not dynamic

Apologies to fans of Blogger/Blogspot's new-ish 'Dynamic Views' functionality. This is not (yet) available at this is my england. Sure, it's visually quite appealing to see a blog's content dancing around the screen in  a tumblr-stylee. But I wouldn't like the loss of all control around the look and feel of this place. For what it's worth, I've spent a fair bit of time fiddling around with fonts, layouts, buttons (linking to the this is my england presence on Facebook and Twitter) and the like. So I'm disinclined to gain zippy, zingy 'dynamism' at the cost of presenting the stuff here in a font and colour palette that's not of my own choosing. 

So, we at this is my england global HQ look forward to future tweaks to Blogger's presentation and viewing engine. Once it's possible to own/control the header, footer, sidebars, widgets, choice of font etc., this rather conservative organ may be ready to jump on board.

PS: pinch, punch, first day of the month, and no return

I always feel like somebody's watching me

I'm just an average man
With an average life
I work from 9 to 5
Hey well I pay the price
All I want is to be left alone
In my average home
But why do I always feel
I'm in the twilight zone and...
[lyrics by Rockwell]

DLR

airport

you dirty old man

mind the expectation gap

Seasoned London commuters think nothing of the Underground network's recorded messages warning passengers to take care when stepping from the station platform to the train door. Small children and out-of-town visitors, however, often seem to find the recording remarkably amusing. So much so that among latter group there exists a market for t-shirts bearing the familiar slogan.

This Sunday, visiting Aston Villa fans using the Central Line to get to White City seem to be especially aware of the gap. The gap, that is, between their expectations for the season ahead and the sudden surge of optimism being expressed by supporters of their opponents on the day.

Since this is my england last bothered to report on a QPR match (their [deliberate?] tumble at the first hurdle of the League Cup), new majority shareholder Tony Fernandes has delighted the Rangers faithful with a wealth of exciting signings. So far, these additions to the squad have combined to good effect.

Almost immediately after a hectic transfer deadline day, the Shepherds Bush outfit dominated visiting Newcastle United, albeit without hitting the back of the net. As the only QPR fan watching the 0-0 stalemate in my local boozer, I found it to be a tense affair, but the R's were very clearly the better side on the night. As reported by the Guardian, Newcastle manager Alan Pardew was heard, in his nasal tones, to ask and answer his own rhetorical question thus: "Am I disappointed with a point? No, not when when we didn't deserve any more."

Better was to follow when the West London side travelled up to Molyneaux to face Mick McCarthy's Wolves last Saturday. Neil Warnock's team ran rampant, scoring three goals without reply, hogging possession and gathering praise for a stylish performance.

What of the new recruits?

The midfield upgrade

Well, wasn't it inevitable that the first appearance of much-maligned midfielder Joey Barton would come against the club from which he had just departed in acrimonious circumstances? Against Newcastle, though, Barton simply looked usefully efficient, making his own contribution to QPR's good performance and seeming to bring out the best in established Rangers players. In both of Barton's QPR appearances thus far, his companions in the centre of QPR's midfield are playing like men transformed. The grey-haired veteran Shaun Derry, he of the endless perfectly-timed and crucially important tackling, had already made a successful adjustment to top flight football. Playing alongside Barton, he looks even better. Also improved is Alejandro Faurlin. Already looking comfortable in the Premier League, the Argentinean was described as an "outstanding" contributor to the win over Wolves by the Daily Mail's Alex Kay. Before the season started, it was the temperamental but brilliant Moroccan Adel Taarabt who was being spoken of as the one QPR player likely to be a transfer target for more prominent clubs in England and abroad. Now I wonder if Faurlin will be the one to attract most interest during the next transfer window. His passing and positioning looks excellent.

Solid at the back
Via Twitter, no end of mockery was expressed about the signing of 21 year-old Armand Traore, the French-born left back acquired from Arsenal on deadline day. The young full back had last been seen looking no more effective than the hapless team mates around him on the day the Gunners capitulated miserably to a rampant Manchester United side. So the theme of most mocking tweets seemed to be around QPR having done Arsenal a favour by relieving the north London club of a useless player. I don't think I was alone, however, in paying no heed to these remarks. Other glimpses I'd had of Traore in an Arsenal shirt (and on loan at Portsmouth in 2008-09) had given me cause to believe that the Rangers were signing up a player with great pace, good versatility and the ability to present a much-needed attacking option down the left flank. So it has proved. In a hooped shirt, Traore is now zooming the length of the pitch and whipping in inviting crosses to good effect. Verdict: looks like a top signing. Arsenal, I feel, may come to regret the transaction, too.

Also joining the QPR back line since Tony Fernandes started getting his chequebook out: Anton Ferdinand, formerly of Sunderland and Luke Young, joining from Sunday's opponents. Young,  aged 32 and with a few England caps to his name, brings much-needed top flight experience to the Rangers defence and has ousted Bradley Orr from the right back position. Prior to the season, some QPR fans were worrying about a lack of both pace and proven Premier League credentials at the back, with the two full back positions looking a particular worry. That such concerns were expressed in no way detracts from the appreciation felt for the efforts of Orr on the right and Clint Hill on the left during last season's successful promotion campaign. Doubtless, most supporters will have developed some affection for both players, who came across as solid, dependable and likeable professionals. So, this is my england joins those sending good wishes to Clint Hill as he begins a loan stint with Steve McLaren's Nottingham Forest.

Villa: Why worry?
Both QPR and Sunday's visitors from the Second City have gained seven points from their first five fixtures. While six of QPR's points have come from away wins, Aston Villa have set out their stall as draw specialists, picking up four points from tied matches. The lone win came against a Blackburn side that, recent heroics against Arsenal notwithstanding, must surely count among many pundits' choices for relegation.

Perhaps, then, there is some justification for the wailing and gnashing of teeth emanating from some Aston Villa Internet forums and messageboards.

In response to a match prediction piece at the Villa Blog, M5Villa writes "We'll get beat on Sunday, regardless of how well our team plays because our midfield does not have enough steel", adding "I don't think we're any better than Wolves and QPR caned them." Similarly pessimistic, TheBlackPearl opines that "it's a QPR win for me, they have too much quality in the middle of the park and we will likely give them the majority of the possession as per usual."

At Heroes and Villains, meanwhile, contributors are lining up to predict a home win, with some fearing a real drubbing.

I wonder, though, if it's a bit premature to be thinking of the Rangers as genuinely tough opposition. This comes, after all, in the wake of just two performances good enough to attract warm praise. So while it's tempting as a QPR supporter to get carried away by the current mood of excitement, I do still keep in mind that the Tony Fernandes revolution is at a very early stage. I wonder, too, about the effect of opponents sitting up and taking notice in the wake of recent good results,  now not making the mistake of underestimating Neil Warnock's side. I also worry a little about the impact of any unhelpful combination of injuries. QPR, for me, now have a decent Premier League team. But a strong squad? How much top talent is sitting on the bench or playing in the reserves for QPR? Not enough, perhaps.

I also wonder if Villa supporters, though perhaps justifiably disappointed by their club's approach to the transfer market, are making too much of a slow start. While I wouldn't tip Villa to be in the running for a top six or seven finish, I daresay they won't flirt for long with the lowest reaches of the table. My sense is that Sunday's opponents are of mid-table quality. Given that right-thinking QPR fans would surely be delighted with a mid-table finish, perhaps the visitors' followers are paying a newly assembled Rangers side too much respect when predicting a thrashing at the hands of the Londoners.

Whatever happens, I'll doubtless be feeling as nervous as usual unless QPR quickly build a two-goal advantage as in the Wolves match.

U RRRRRRRRRRRRRRsssssssssssss