going down by the riverside

When this is my england last turned its attention to the beautiful game and to the twists and turns of this organ's favourite team, the short article, a preview of the away tie at Fulham, concluded by expressing a long-held reluctance to predict the outcome of any Superhoops fixture. Just as well, really. Because, as it turned out, any prediction I might have made would have been wildly off the mark. While an away defeat against a Cottagers side looking for a much-needed first win of the season was always a distinct possibility, such an abject collapse of a previously decent-looking QPR side did not seem likely.

One prediction that was included in Saturday's preview piece was a heavy hint that writing a full match report could be a struggle. The reason given was the likely beffudling effect of sunshine, good fellowship and alcoholic beverages. All of these were indeed in abundant supply. Moreover, I've always found matches harder to follow from a behind-the-goal-and-quite-high-up viewpoint. So that particular prediction has turned out to be accurate.

Behind the goal and high up at Craven Cottage: all hell about to break loose

So the this is my england report on the match itself can be boiled down thus:

• QPR played very badly
• Fulham were decent
• It seems meaningless to rate individual QPR performances - no one had a good game
• It was nice to see Jamie Mackie back in the side, returning, finally, after last season's bad injury, coming on as a sub in the second half

Another prediction that was on the money concerned the abilities of the two sets of supporters to generate some noise. A thumping win was not enough to rouse the genteel home fans from their seemingly habitual state of quiet contemplation. The Rangers faithful, on the other hand, just seemed to get louder and louder each time Paddy Kenny picked the ball out of the back of the net.

At half time, with the R's down by just the three goals, I wondered if a respectable result might be possible. A draw seemed out of the question. A win seemed beyond the realms of wildest fantasy. But perhaps a goal? Maybe a resolute second-half rearguard action to prevent further scoring by the home side? Giddy thoughts, then, of just a 3-1 defeat, were briefly entertained during the half-time break.

But no. Just before the hour mark, Fulham's Andy Johnson completed his hat-trick. "Four nil down, we don't give a fuck, we're QPR and we're staying up," roared the away supporters. Yet another re-purposing of the old 'Tom Hark' tune. Before too long, the same song was ringing out still louder, with the words 'five', then 'six' substituted for the original 'four'.

That so few of the singers headed for the exits before the final whistle speaks volumes about the defiance and good humour of many of our club's fans. Much, too, was made of that contrast in the ways in which the home and away fans were expressing themselves. The usual taunts, then, from the Rangers faithful - "You're supposed to be a home"; "Six nil and you still won't sing" etc.

Fulham was also accused of being "a ground full of tourists". A trifle harsh, perhaps. That said, for those QPR fans in the Fulham's extraordinary 'neutral' section of the Putney End, the presence of large numbers of silent Asian and European visitors (some wearing bits and pieces of Fulham memorabilia) fuelled the enthusiasm for that particular song.

Another song that got an airing used the ever-popular 'Go west' tune. Call me puerile if you will, but I could not help smiling at the away supporters' off-colour reference to Craven Cottage's nasty Michael Jackson monument. 

The funny thing is, this was not nearly so bad a day out as you might suppose. The result was horrible. But the response of the home supporters was a world away from what I'd experienced at Elland Road almost seven years ago, on the day that Brian Deane scored four of Leeds United's six goals against a hapless Rangers side. Then, my little party had been repeatedly taunted by junior Yorkshiremen while trudging away from the ground. I experienced literally none of that on the streets of SW6 and in a pub where fans of both sides were mixing after the match.

The weather was much better this weekend, too. Almost too warm, if anything - queuing for a drink on the Fulham Palace Road was sweaty work. The black humour of the defiantly noisy singsong, too, was enjoyable in its own way. As a pal and I walked away from the Cottage, watching a few home fans nipping into smart and pricey houses in nearby streets, we both agreed that, weirdly, the afternoon had somehow been more enjoyable than it might have been had the Rangers suffered a narrower margin of defeat. A case of laughter in the dark, really.

Looking ahead, the next fixture looks crucial. QPR will entertain a struggling Blackburn side at Loftus Road. A decent win and we're back on track, putting the Fulham result behind us and dismissing it as just one of those bad days. But if the Rangers contrive to lose - or even get only a draw - things could look different and the recent mood of optimism may be sorely tested. Because after that seemingly benign home tie against apparently poor opposition comes a much more challenging run of games - Chelsea, Spurs and Man City are up next. Crikey.

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